Howdy 🤠
Last year I re-read Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo in anticipation for the release of the Shadow & Bone series which I ended up loving so much. While I re-read that though, I shared my favourite quotes & moments from the book.
Fast forward just under a year later and the new cast members for season two of Shadow & Bone was released: Nikolai, Tamar, Tolya and Wylan!!!
I’ve been meaning to re-read Crooked Kingdom since last year, and once again it was something revolving the TV show that finally pushed me to do so. Just like with Six of Crows I’ve picked out my favourite quotes and moments that I want to share
*Spoilers*
His prayers turned to screams, but both went unanswered.
What a lovely way to kick off the sequel. Really sets the scene for the roller coaster that is this book.
“I don’t like this” said Matthias.
Jesper had smiled his reckless gunslinger’s grin. “To be fair, Matthias, you don’t like much”.
Wylan knew Nina could handle just about any man and any situation, but he didn’t think she should have to sit half-dressed in a drafty gamling parlor, perched on some leering lawyer’s lap. At the very least, she was probably going to catch cold.
Getting Wylan’s PoV was the greatest gift this book could ever give me. I love him!
“Nina is fine. Jesper is fine. Everyone is fine except for me because I’m stuck with a gang of hand-wringing nursemaids. Keep a watch”.
Wylan shrugged apologetically at Matthias, who looked like he was considering dashing Kaz’s skull against a wall, then hurried along the cobblestones after Kaz”.
“[…] Why do you guys say that anyways? No mourners, no funerals? Why not just say good luck or be safe?
“We like to keep our expectations low”.
I use this philosophy of keeping my expectations low when it comes to grades, not my life expectancy. Still a fat mood though.
Kaz neatened his hair with his finger and handed the five kruge to Wylan. “Don’t spend it all in one place. Let’s move”.
Kaz in Dad mode.
It was still disconcerting to see him and Kuwei in the same room. Nina’s tailoring had been so successful that Matthias often had trouble telling them apart until they spoke. He wished one of them would do him the courtesy of wearing a hat.
There’s nothing overly special about this passage. I just like the image of it.
Kuwei squirmed nervously. “Why is he looking at me this way?”
“Kaz is wondering if he should keep you alive”, said Jesper. “Terrible for the nerves. I recommend deep breathing. Maybe a tonic”.
When Shadow & Bone starts focusing more on the crows and this story line it’s going to go from serious fantasy show to full on sitcom and I can’t wait.
Wylan shrugged. “Maybe. Not all poisons have an antidote”.
Jesper snorted. “That’s why we call him Wylan Van Sunshine”.
There was a long, tense pause, then Kaz ran a gloved thumb over the crease of his trousers and said, “Nina, love, translate for me? I want to make sure Kuwei and I understand each other”.
Kaz calling Nina love >>>
“He says you’re cruel”.
“I’m pragmatic. If I were cruel, I’d give him a eulogy instead of a conversation”.
“Don’t worry, Da. People point guns at each other all the time in Ketterdam. It’s basically a handshake.”
“Is that true?” his father asked as the scholar grudgingly moved aside and they shoved the heavy desk in front of the door.
“Absolutely”, said Wylan.
“Certainly not”, said the scholar. Jesper waved them on. “Depends on the neighbourhood. Let’s go”.
“Madelaine?” Jesper said. “Madeleine Michaud?”
“You said we’d have breakfast!”
“I had to go to Fjerda”.
“Fjerda?”
Jesper headed up the stairs after Wylan, then poked his head back into the reading room. “If I live, I’ll buy you waffles”.
“You don’t have enough money to buy her waffles,” Wylan grumbled.
Jesper while running from people shooting at him: *flirting* // Wyaln, also running from people shooting at him: *jealous*.
But Inej was done being frightened of this man. Before Van Eck could take another breath, she slammed her forehead upward, shattering his nose. He screamed and released her as blood gushed over his fine mercher suit. Instantly, his guards were on her, pulling her back.
“Always hit where the mark isn’t looking”, Wylan had murmured.
“Sweet Ghezen”, said Jesper. “You’ve been thoroughly corrupted”.
“[…] So I’m asking, do you want to beat Van Eck?”
“Yes”, said Inej. She wanted some kind of justice.
“Soundly”, said Nina.
“Around the ears with Wylan’s flute”, said Jesper”
“Inej”, Jesper whispered.
She leaned forward, peering at Wylan. “Is that scheming face?”
“Possibly”.
Wylan seemed to snap back to reality. “It is not. But …. But I do think I have an idea”.
Inej and Jesper are a really underrated duo.
“Cure you and all your Saint”, he said to no one at all, then realised he was smiling
Of course I have to include one of the very few times Kaz Brekker actually smiles!
“I would come for you”, he said, and when he saw the wary look she shot him, he said it again. “I would come for you. And if I couldn’t walk I’d crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we’d fight our way out together – knives drawn, pistols blazing. Because that’s what we do. We never stop fighting”.
Legit screeched when I saw this line coming up. Good thing I have the house to myself.
“My mother is Ketterdam. She birthed me in the harbour. And my father is profit. I honour him daily […]”.
Her temper he could bear, but her disappointment was unacceptable. Matthias knew only the language of war. He did not have the words for this. “Meeting you was a disaster”.
She raised a brow. “Thank you”.
Djel, he was terrible at this. He stumbled on, trying to make her understand. “But I am grateful every day for that disaster. I needed a cataclysm to shake me from the life I knew. You were an earthquake, a landslide”.
He’d spent the last hour trying to explain to Kuwei how they would reach the embassy, and he was starting to get the distinct impression the kid was playing dumb – possibly because he was enjoying the ridiculous gestures Jesper was making.
*in the spongebob narrator voice* half a page later:
“Why do you keep staring at him?” Kuwei said. “I look just like him. You could look at me”.
“I’m not staring at him,” protested Jesper. “I’m … overseeing their work”. The sooner Kuwei got on that boat, the better. The tomb was starting to feel crowded.
“Pick up the pace,” Kaz said, eyeing his watch.
“If I spill a single drop of this, it will burn straight through the floor onto my father’s dinner guests”
“Take your time”
“”That’s where you’re wrong”, Kaz said. “I don’t hold a grudge, I cradle it, I coddle it. I feed it fine cuts of meat and send it to the best schools. I nurture my grudges, Rollins”.
Dramatic ass bitch.
She rested her head on his shoulder. “You’re better than waffles, Matthias Helvar”. A small smile curled the Fjerdan’s lips. “Let’s not say thing we don’t mean, my love”.
*Ok this is nearly half a page and I’m sorry but this entire scene is hilarious to me*
“Jesper Llewellyn Fahey, that is enough!” he roared.
Jesper and Kaz both startled, and then, to Wylan’s shock, they stepped away from each other, looking guilty.
“Just what is going on here?” Colm said. “I thought you were friends”.
Jesper ran a hand over the back of his neck, looking like he wanted to vanish through the floorboards. “We … uh … we were having a disagreement”.
“I can see that. I have been very patient with all of this, Jesper, but I am at my limit. I want you down here before I count ten or I will tan your hide so you don’t sit for two weeks”.
Colm’s head vanished back down the stairs. The silence stretched.
Then Nina giggled. “You are in so much trouble”.
Jesper scowled. “Matthias, Nina let Cornelius Smeet grope her bottom”.
Nina stopped laughing. “I am going to turn your teeth inside out”.
“That is physically impossible”.
“I just raised the dead. Do you really want to argue with me?”
Inej cocked her head to one side. “Jesper Llewellyn Fajey?”
“Shut up”, said Jesper. “It’s a family name.
As much as I can believe that they’re bad-ass thieves and murderers (because I go into it knowing it’s a fantasy and I can suspend my disbelief) but I still really enjoy when they act like actual teenagers like this.
“You’re a very good kisser”, called Kuwei after him.
Jesper turned, “How good is your Kerch really?”
“Fairly good”.
“Okay, then I hope you understand exactly what I mean when I say you are definitely more trouble than you’re worth”.
Kuwei beamed, looking entirely too pleased with himself. “Kaz seems to think I’m worth a great deal now”.
Jesper rolled his eyes skyward. “You fit right in here”.
Kuwei pretending he doesn’t speak Kerch is such a power move and knowing this during my re-read made all of his interactions so funny to me.
Tell her to get out, a voice inside him demanded. Beg her to stay.
Two of the deadliest people the Barrel had to offer and they could barely touch each other without them both keeling over. But they’d tried. He’d tried. Maybe they could try again.
It was hard to believe a lowly canal rat had struck a deal with a king.
“I promise, Matthias, I’ll take you home.”
“Nina”, he said, pressing her hand to his heart. “I am already home”.
I sobbed for a fair few chapters. Can’t even fully blame it on it nearly being my time of the month. Bardugo knows how to pull at my heartstrings.
Inej placed her hands on Nina’s shoulders. “We’ll see each other again”.
“Of course we will. You’ve saved my life. I’ve saved yours”.
“I think you’re ahead on that count”.
“No, I don’t mean in the big ways.” Nina’s eyes took them all in. “I mean the little rescues. Laughing at my jokes. Forgiving me when I was foolish. Never trying to make me feel small. It doesn’t matter if it’s next month, or next year, or ten years from now, those will be the things I remember when I see you again”.
I love them.
Kuwei turned to Jesper . “You should visit me in Ravka. We could learn to use oour powers together”.
“How about I push you in the canal and we see if you know how to swim?” Wylan said with a very passable imitation of Kaz’s glare.
She felt his knuckles slide against her. Then his hand was in her hand, his palm was pressed against her own. A tremor moved through him. Slowly, he let their fingers entwine”.
Interactions like this >>> Kanej actually kissing.
This was fun. Since reading Crooked Kingdom and writing this post the first photo of Kit Young and Jack Wolf on set together as Jesper and Wylan and they look so good together. I’m ridiculously excited for season 2 of the show.
Another thing I’m excited for is to finally start reading King of Scars!!! Thanks for reading :))
AceReader 
omg i did not know how much I needed this post, and now i’m once again in the crooked kingdom hangover phase😭 i really do want to reread it soon, i reread SoC a couple months back so it’s probably time to get to Ck one again.
literally all these scenes are so close to my heart, thank you for sharing!! and I read the king of scars duology recently and i’m sure you’ll love it as much as I did!!!
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Thats good to hear since I’ve heard mixed things about the King of Scars duology.
HOpe you enjoy your re-read of Crooked Kingdom when you get around to it!! :))
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“I would come for you. And if I couldn’t walk I’d crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we’d fight our way out together – knives drawn, pistols blazing. Because that’s what we do. We never stop fighting”
This one still has my heart 😭😭. Amazing list!
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Was genuinley looking forward to reading this moment again when I started re-reading. *chefs kisses*
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